Kimi Marin Yoga

Honor limitations. Transcend Boundaries.

My May Manifesto

A manifesto is a declaration of principles. Sianna Sherman asked people to write a manifesto for May. A manifesto is a great opportunity to put your greatest desires into the world and watch the extraordinary effect you have on the people around you. Each time you set an intention, whether inwardly or aloud, whether in yoga class or under the full moon, whether to a lover or a friend, you are allowing for a wish to began to manifest.  When you speak your intentions aloud your ears hear what your heart whispers.

Here is my May manifesto:

I spend much of my time in my head looking out. Instead of chastising myself for this, I will continue to look out to ask the questions, but look within for the answers.

I will no longer be afraid of my intuition, my inspiration, my light, but rather foster it.
I will foster my light as I foster others’ light.
I will not hide from my passion or think myself unworthy of my potential.

I will let go of judgements and see the beauty in everyone.

I will allow myself to cry when my heart breaks…and when it rejoices.

I will hold myself up and help others by letting them stand on my shoulders when they can’t see.

I will raise a child with my chest exposed and provide a nurturing home to all beings: two-legs, fins, scales, 4-legs, wings…there will be no difference.

I will see when I need to rest and honor that time.

Life sometimes asks me to take the shape of warrior II, sometimes vasisthasana, and sometimes balasana: I will honor all stages, all transitions, with patience.

Ultimately, I will remember that even a bird learns how to fly.

10 Tips to Get Off Your Butt

Back when I was running an average of 6 miles a day, one thing was always certain: the first mile was always the hardest.  I loved running but there were days where I didn’t want to run — but once I started, I didn’t want to stop. On those days when getting out the door was tough, my reason would compromise with my desire-to-chill in order to get my body moving. Here are some of the tips I learned to get out the door and how I have adapted them for different areas to get my “butt off the couch” – Please use what you can, change what you need, discard what doesn’t work:

1) For running/walking/biking: All I need to do is go around the block. 1 block. 5 minutes. That is all.

2) For running/walking/biking: All I need to do is make it to that lightpost/tree/stopsign/*insert*.

3) For meditation: 5 minutes is all I need.

4) For meditation: Just 1 minute. Just 1 minute.

5) Yoga practice at home: 3 sun saluations, that is it. Maybe a warrior II…

6) Yoga practice at a studio: All I have to do is breathe.

7) Yoga practice at a studio: I can be in child’s pose is all else fails.

8) Quitting smoking  (taking a friend’s word on this technique): All I have to do is not smoke this hour/meal/day

9) For not eating that yummy temptation: hmmm– I haven’t figured that out yet

10) For anything: Don’t think, move

Ultimately, if you enjoy something that is biggest draw — remember what you love and do it.  Adapt these for your life. I would LOVE to hear your motivational tools.

In Joy, Yogis!

Utilizing My Voice: Doing What I Can To Make a Difference

We have all heard that we have a responsibility to the future and thatwhat we do today will affect the seventh generation and because of this we must bear in mind our responsibility to them today and always“. We cannot keep consuming and taking from this Earth — we have got to find out how to give back.

Have you ever seen a picture or heard a story that just made your heart hurt? I had that experience today when I saw a picture of an orangutan and her baby. The picture, the cruelty humans inflicted is not necessary to discuss, but I cried and asked “what can I do to make things a bit better? What is my part in this affair?”.

The rainforests, Earth’s lungs, are home to orangutans. Right now, deforestation by palm oil companies and land-use, illegal trading, hunting, and forest fires threatens the survival of orangutans. At the rate we are depleting the rainforests in Indonesia and Malaysia not only are we threatening human survival but conservationists predict orangutangs will be extinct within ten years.What are we leaving for our kids’ children? How are we making this world great when we are stealing from it?

So, what can I do about this? I can write a note on Facebook to draw awareness to this problem, I can post on my website, I can boycott palm oil, I can do further research about how my consumer behaviors affect the rest of the world, I can tweet, and I can donate money to groups that I believe really are on the front lines working to save orangutans, humans, Earth, and life as we know it.  This is what I can do.

Some Questions

I was at a TEDx event today and a woman gave me a handout of random questions from www.squirrelfarm.org. I think some are fun and some take real thought.

I would love to know your answers:

1) What color is  ‘Funny’? Orange and blue. It is a like a fish.

2) Where do you like to read? In bed

3) Which one of every 24 hours most resembles you? 2p — full of sunshine, sometimes the heat is too much, in the heart of the day, still full of possibilities

4) what makes a weapon a weapon? The intention in using it

5) What is the sound of a Friend? uninhibited laughter

The New Kid: My Yoga Experience at City Studios

I feel like I have fit myself in a yoga box – only experiencing yoga through the lens of the teachers and studios where I teach. Do you do that? Always go to the same studio, same teacher,  place your mat in same spot ? I needed to get a fresh perspective – step off my rectangular mat and expand my mind and body by experiencing yoga around my city, Portland. I took classes at multiple yoga studios around town. I’ve braved the drive across bridges, across neighborhoods, across east and west boundaries, and I’ve discovered what the yoga scene in this city has to offer.

Yoga for Night Owls at Yoga

I am not a night owl and getting to a 9:30p.m. class was a struggle, but the struggle was well worth it. I felt like I was with a different crowd and Darren Littlejohn was a different teacher.  Gone were the polished students with designer clothes and instead were night owls with worn t-shirts, sweats, and faded tights. Littlejohn teaches more from his heart than any other teacher I’ve taken class with in Portland. With his full voice and constant enthusiasm his love of teaching, and his love of yoga, were obvious. And his students seem to love him right back. When I first arrived and mentioned that I had never been to the studio before, several students immediately told me I came to the best teacher. With his smile inducing “y’all” and constant adjustments (loved the adjustments!) he let his authentic self shine. Although I didn’t agree with some of his breath cues or teaching cues, his style worked.  He had something to say, to teach, and most importantly, students responded. The class is taught in candlelight, which, surprising to me, made it hard to balance. But my struggle dissipated into a long corpse pose with a neck rub and a foot massage. I left relaxed and not at all minding that the class lasted over 90 minutes, that it was after 11p.m. and I had to teach at 6:15a.m. the following morning.

Free Class at Lululemon

I went to Lululemon for a free yoga class. It turns out they were teaching Qigong that night instead. I feigned interest, signed up, and then left. I’m not proud of my behavior.

Bob Marley: Yoga Music Series

I do not have an ear for music or how beats work so when someone like Chris Calarco, who loves music, comes along, I hop on board in awe. The Yoga Music Series is put on by Calarco and usually has a live DJ (with wine afterwards!) and a featured music artist. I went to the Bob Marley groove and it was terrific. When Calarco said that beat of the music was like the beat of a heart, he surely was right. It was easy moving into the flow, his alignment cues took me deeper into the poses, and his words of the heart harmonized with Marley’s lyrics. Most intoxicating was Calarco’s pure love of the music. Calarco teaches from an enraptured connection with the musical beats, the lyrics, and our breath

 

Yoga Foundations

“I am from Boston. In Boston people come in and you start your practice–just do it. Here in Portland, the teacher sits up front and says something profound, Well, I have nothing deep to say” and with that a great class began. Maria Guerrero had plenty of deep wisdom and information to share.  As a yoga teacher I know how hard it is to teach a beginner class. How hard it is to find the right balance of information, instruction, and depth; Guerrero walks that tightrope with ease and agility. She has a gift for teaching the basics of how-to do a pose and always offers why we do it. And she tells students what the Sanskrit words mean. Beforehand, I thought I was going to a class that would be based on breaking down the poses and that I would spend most of the ninety minutes watching the instructor, but that never happened. Guerrero leads students through a challenging class, breaking down poses, giving background, and cues, all the while muscles shake and we return back to the basics.

Community Class

Jessica Garay started class by relating her dream the night before. There is something open and relaxing about her. I am not too comfortable with chanting but Garay dispelled anxiety by explaining what we will chant and why we are chanting the words she had for us that day. Having a bit of background and understanding of what I was doing helped me open to the experience; I chanted with hesitant gusto. This was how she led the entire class – with a clear path as to what and why we were doing the poses. Garay led students into a practice that required focus and strength and was always fun.  She exudes comfort while teaching which creates a relaxed atmosphere in which to learn in. The community class is an all levels class, and Garay seamlessly met everyone at their level.

 

 

Sadhana Practice

Okay, this was a bump on my yogic path. The early hours of the morning are considered the ambrosia hours – the auspicious, favorable, hours for success. I decided to try a kundalini class that ran from 4:30a.m.-7 a.m. This is early, even for a morning person like me.  I read on the website to wear a scarf on my head to keep the energy in my body, so I did. Thrilled just to be going, I donned my black sweatshirt, navy blue sweatpants, and my scarf adorned my head like a stylish Parisian. I arrived at the center to find people in all white and wearing their scarves wrapped around their heads more like turbans than a fashion style.  I didn’t feel exceptionally welcome, and, being new, I felt self-conscious. Add in the fact that I knew none of the chanting, the songs, or the movements, I felt like a big dark spot in the midst of white light; I snuck out after an hour into the practice into the two-and-a-half hour practice. Yeah, I snuck out. I was that person.

Forrest Yoga

Willow Ryan is a woman whose strength and embodiment of power was a tad intimidating yet her smile instantly soothed my nerves. Ryan teaches a strong, alignment-based class interspersed with breath work to help students get deeper into their body. She is very knowledgeable about the body and her experience as both a yoga teacher and practitioner is evident in her ability to pinpoint how a student needs to readjust their body to move into a posture fully and with ease. I left this class fulfilled, yet wanting to cry. I heard a rumor that Forrest yoga can have this effect on a person. I don’t know what long-buried emotional baggage I released in Ryan’s class but I feel lighter because of it.

Budokon

My first question: what is Budokon? The founder, Cameron Shayne, describes it as a “living art” that incorporates ancient and modern yogic and martial arts. This class was fantastic. Nathan Mills is a teacher whose patience and non-judgmental demeanor made me feel welcomed. Also, watching his amazing ability to control even the minute movements of his body made him an inspiration. As I watched him demonstrate a sequence, a movement, or shape, I thought “Damn! I want to do that!” simultaneously with “Sh%T! I could never do that!” Budokon movements are fluid and soft, a continuous exploration of bodily strength, alignment, and balance. I especially loved that I was doing yoga and at the same time using my body in new ways through martial arts.  The spinal rolls felt good in my back, caused me to note my strength and forced me to check in with my weaknesses. The animal shapes he had us do for conditioning, made me laugh and feel like a child exploring nature; and the kicks and punches just made me feel strong–even when I had no idea what I was doing.

Morning Yoga: Rise, Shine, and Downward Dog

**I also have this entry published at www.yogabhoga.com**

Waking up, getting out of bed is hard. I am a morning person and I still think it is hard. Getting out of bed to be active is even harder; especially when sleeping is a more appealing thought. But when you get to class, roll out your mat, there is nothing more empowering than realizing that the only reason you are there is because of your own sheer will.

Nobody made you get there; nobody forced you there.
You fought every ounce of you that wanted to roll over and sleep. There are many reasons you may miss an afternoon class: you have too much work, you are meeting up with friends, or maybe your kids need to be taken somewhere. In the morning, often the only thing stopping you is your own mental inertia. What an empowering feeling to know you fought the one thing preventing you from being there: your own mind. And isn’t that what yoga is about? Freeing ourselves from our own habits and mental preoccupations?

In the afternoon when people come onto their mat, they often need to unwind and release the day. Sometimes their time on the mat is the first chance of stillness from jumping out of bed and rushing to work to the endless demands of the day. In the morning, the path is calmer. You start from a place of within, of slumber, and unfold into the external world.

With your breath patterns you begin to move your body at a tempo in line with your own natural rhythms. As you breathe and move into the poses, you improve circulation, stimulate the mind, and in The Key Muscles of Yoga, Ray Long states “performing dynamic stretching in the morning ‘resets’ the resting muscle length for the day.” On both a physical and mental level you create an intention and cohesiveness that can last throughout the day.

When you do get there, when you do make it first thing in the morning, your resolve and strength has been tested and your will won. When you already beat your mind at the first battle of your day, how can the rest not get easier?

 

Long, Ray. The Key Muscles of Yoga. Volume 1. 3rd ed. Canada: Bandha Yoga Publications, 2006.

Something To Remember

I found this quote in the most recent issue of Yoga International and believe it is worth sharing:

There is nothing in a caterpillar that tells you it’s going to be a butterfly.” — Richard Buckminster Fuller

The Happy Couple: Sthira and Sukha

Coco Chanel is a woman whose strength, tenacity, and supreme belief in herself, I admire. Ms. Chanel once said “Luxury must be comfortable, otherwise it is not luxury.” This is also true of yoga: without alertness and comfort, Sthira and Sukha, in our asana practice, it is not yoga. Sthira is steadiness and alertness and Sukha is comfort.

In a yoga practice, both qualities must be in balance and present. When we hold a posture and think about how our knees hurt or can’t wait to move into the next posture, we are not in a state of comfort — there is no Sukha present. Instead of practicing yoga, we were practicing a form of self-torture. If we are in posture and so comfortable that our mind drifts to what we just ate or fantasize about our latest crush, Sthira, alertness, is not present. This is not yoga, but daydreaming.

To find the perfect balance of Sthira and Sukha in your practice, move through breath and kramas (or stages) of each pose. Learn to listen to your breath, join breath and movement — remember breath is the link between the internal and external body. Also, be mindful of where you are TODAY — note any stiffness or openness and back off or go deeper into a pose as necessary. Most important to remember, is the honor that you have the luxury of yoga in your day, in your life.

Bend, Balance, Breathe: A Little Life Ditty

In December, I found myself in life’s equivalent of half-pigeon, a pose that is not only physically intense but requires mental stamina to stay present. Life had put me in an uncomfortable, and unfamiliar, place and all I could do was breathe and stay with the moment. I told this to a girlfriend and she said that pose for her is virasana, or hero’s pose. It occurred to me that life is made up of different yoga poses, or rather, the lessons learned from particular poses. Just like dogs have been bred to highlight particular traits or abilities for specific jobs, asanas bend our bodies and affect our minds in different ways to pin point the varieties of life’s particularities: backbends are energizing, heart and hip openers are emotional. In class, we also are reminded that yoga is a practice. But what  are we practicing?

A teacher used to say that what we do on the mat is indicative of what we do off the mat. Or as a girlfriend of mine says “where you are, there you is” – meaning we do not change who we are and what our tendencies are just because we have changed our clothes, moved to a new location, found a new partner, or stepped on our mat. How we react on the mat is how we react off the mat. If your tendency is to avoid conflict, on the mat you may daydream or leave poses as soon as the emotions, tensions, and body trembles begin. How many times in utkatasana, chair pose, or in a twisted crescent lunge do you tap fingers, twitch your face or scrunch your shoulders wishing the teacher would move on to the next pose?

When you are on the mat and you find yourself thinking about how you hate the pose you are in, can’t stand the teacher talking, or wondering when it will all end, you are reinforcing negative thoughts in your day to day life – not just the 60-90 minutes you are on your mat. Working to stay present, working to be mindful and move with integrity, are skills you are strengthening for times off the mat. As we all know, life is hard. We have relationships start and end, bosses and demanding deadlines, familial responsibilities, and the unexpected events that knock us off our paths. In yoga poses, especially the ones that require us to become focused and aware of the triad of mind, breath and body, we are learning to live in every moment. We are learning to revel in the joys and breathe through the sorrows.

When you are moving into a difficult pose and the person next to you makes it look simple and elegant, instead of comparing yourself or competing against them, find santosha, contentment, with what the pose looks like in your body. Finding contentment on the mat, you are practicing contentment off the mat; experiencing, accepting and honoring your limits and your edge.  When you are in a pose for awhile –sometimes 10 breaths, sometimes 3 minutes—“stuff” arises: thoughts, feelings, repressed memories, nausea, etc. When we let the emotions arise, when we put ego to the side, attempt to conquer our distractions – even practice a little svadhyaya (self-study), we notice the tools we use to distract ourselves: day dream, fidget, negative thoughts. When we settle into the pose and breathe, when we remove distractions and sit with who we are, the fundamental core of our being, we learn to be present, be still, and then we learn our own strength, our own power in the uncertainty that is certain in Life.

The Brilliance of Now

What is it about the present moment that makes us want to escape? How much of your day do you spend thinking about the past or day dreaming about the future?  I often drive  around Portland in auto-pilot as I latch onto fantasies, dwell in my jealousy, or turn to the past and linger in a memory. These are tools to escape my present. Pema Chödrön writes in Taking the Leap that the three classic styles to find relief from the present are “pleasure seeking, numbing out, and using aggression: we either zone out, or we grasp.” But what is so wrong with the present that we need to find “relief”?

Ms. Chödrön says that “the ego is the experience of never being present.” I interpret this to mean that it is our ego that gets so wrapped up in the emotions that arise in our mind and body. We are unable to enjoy the flux and uncertainty of life and let each experience be a personal indication of something greater. Yet when we relax and settle into the Now, the ego is not involved since we are an observer and participant instead of ego dictating that our experience is the moment.

When teaching yoga, in poses (especially those held for periods of time) I watch students struggle with their present: they fiddle (pleasure seek), they ride on the their thought waves (numbing out), and tense up (aggression). What they are escaping — what I am escaping–is the reality of who we are. Yet the feelings we have, the anxiety, the sorrow, fear, happiness – all reside in the future or past. Feelings and emotions stay connected to an experience outside of the moment. The present is about being alert to the changes in our body and mind.

I had a realization the other day. I was working in staying in my moment — to notice the sidewalk, listen to my feet on the pavement, feel the sun and cold–and fear arose. I  was afraid that if I stayed in the present moment and didn’t fixate on the future, my motivation, my drive, my inspiration would be gone. I was afraid that by being in the moment and not fixating on other things, I would lose my inspiration and creativity. How absurd! It hit me that inspiration, motivation, creativity, do not come from hashing things out in my head but from a pause– simultaneously tuning within and without. The gift I was receiving was deeper insight into how I work — fears, joy, anxiety, truth, etc.–and opening me up to witness the brilliance of the Now.

Stop, pause, be in your moment. Enjoy the flux of emotions and the unpredictability of life…that is where dreams and reality merge.

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